Yesterday, I had a chance to talk about STILL HANDSOME and the fun I’ve been having with it to another female entrepreneur who’s about my age. If you’ve ever launched a creative idea in the hopes that it would materialize into something tangible, you know where I am in all of this. You feel a crazy mix of wild exhilaration and tacit fear and wretched self-doubt and well, you get the idea: sometimes I feel like I’ve been shot out of a cannon–in a really good way.

The conversation was interesting and timely–at least for me. My colleague just instantly lit up as I talked through my “elevator proposal” for STILL HANDSOME, saying “Oh, my gosh! I have a friend, Stan, who really needs to talk to you. He’s been looking for work for almost a year, and I love him and speak to him pretty candidly, you know, but he’s going about it as if he were right out of college, and Honey, he’s NOT!”

The statistics on re-employing 50+ year-old guys bear out what she was saying: it’s really tough to turn things around in this economy after your company folds or you’re laid off. What she was saying underneath the obvious though was that Stan hasn’t dusted off his resume–really brought it into sharp focus–since the early 90s, and his style and his comb-over are holding him back, too.

I just wanted to put a hand on Stan’s shoulder and say, “Stanley, You’re STILL HANDSOME. You’ve kept your waistline trim, your self-confidence gives you tremendous presence, and you’re willing to learn and grow.” Then, Stan and I could have a look at where he’s been, where he wants to go, what’s out there, and what he needs to do to put it all together and live, as Oprah would tell him, his Best Life Yet!

Did that conversation calm me down? You know, ratchet down that wild exhilaration thing I was talking about? NO. It just added to the crazy energy I feel right now. It was also very, very affirming. I left there thinking, “This thing is really going to work!”

Love y’all!

Do you remember the song that Mac Davis sang? “Oh, Lord, It’s Hard to be Humble”? The one that precedes, “I’m Too Sexy for my Shirt!” by about 20 years? That song was Mac Davis’ pop-country version of “I’m too sexy…” with that same sort of swagger. Does STILL HANDSOME need a theme song? Well, I’ll bet if we started searching for “Good Lord, I’m
Amazing” sorts of songs, we could download a playlist that would entertain us on a trans-continental flight and not have the first repeat.

“Oh, Lord! It’s Hard to be Humble…when You’re STILL HANDSOME!” Sound pompous? Who cares? There might be people who hear a Man of a Certain Age say that and tell him to sit down and dial it back a notch. Ignore them. You’re feeling good, happy to be alive, and
you’re really not concerned if some people aren’t as self-assured as you are—people who
are intimidated when they hear you crow a little.

If you spend too much time dwelling on the headlines or drafting another copy of your resume after the tenth or fiftieth time you’ve been rejected for an interview, you wouldn’t have much to crow about. Nationally, there are five applicants for every advertised job, and according to some dreary statistics, it takes a 50+ year-old man three times as long to get re-employed as it does a 30-something. Forget it! Don’t dwell on that terrible news! There are STILL HANDSOMEs who are seizing this opportunity to re-evaluate their unique skill sets and experience, dust off their resumes and interview savvy, and launch themselves into new and exciting careers. Now, they’re going places they only dreamed of while they were trapped in a corporate grind or stuck in a mind-numbing job they’d felt pressed to keep because it paid the bills while the kids were growing up.

You’re absolutely still in the game, STILL HANDSOME! “Oh, Lord! Get Loud and be Proud!”

I adore my STILL HANDSOME husband, but I’m nobody’s welcome mat. So, let me make it clear what kind of admirers make up the STILL HANDSOME Adoration Society: if your self-esteem is alive and well, but you’re devoted to supporting a STILL HANDSOME man stay healthy and smartly dressed and active, you’re One of Us. June Cleaver clones? Hardly. For Heaven’s sake: Some of us are gay partners.

Biology and the part of our culture that’s youth-obsessed has made too much of May-September relationships: the idea that a Man of a Certain Age desperately longs to have a couple of 25-year-olds around instead of his devoted, similarly aged lover. That notion is insulting to mature men and their significant others. A STILL HANDSOME man may complain about his growing aches and pains, receding hairline, and statin side-effects, but he is comfortable in his own skin, proud of the man he’s become over the years, and happy to have a wife, lover or significant other who appreciates his wisdom and identifies with his personal experience.

People have asked me whether “The Care and Feeding of Your STILL HANDSOME” seminars are sexist or condescending. “No! No Way!” is the answer to that. I’m not bringing infotainment to a group of Stepford Wives/Partners in 2010! Those of us who go with him to Nordstrom’s to buy new “interview” clothes or suggest a new haircut or praise him when he cuts back on sugary-fatty-salty foods are just strong-minded people who are happy to see our STILL HANDSOMEs thrive and delight in watching him stride around with his shoulders back and a big smile on his face. We’ll never be anyone’s welcome mat—just adoring fans!