If you’re not celebrating yourself every day, tell me this: what are you waiting on?
Let me remind you of a metaphor that I like to use to draw people a picture of Possibility Thinking: your mind receives and holds negative information like Velcro and positive information like Teflon. It is proven science, and it is a measurable piece of brain research that I treat as a big, yummy piece of motivation. So what, Science? So what if my brain grabs on and clings to negative stuff and pays less attention to the positive stuff?
I defy you, Science! I defy you, Brain!
The victory is in the numbers. You defy the brain and its pattern behavior by overloading it with positive affirmations and possibility thinking to top up your brain like your coffee cup. You defy brain science by sending it three times the amount of positive input to negative. Three times is the optimum ratio—3 to 1. I’m sending twelve men out on the field, and I’m defying the refs to throw a flag. My aim every day is to provide three times the amount of positive input into my brain to counterbalance its pattern to grab on to the negative stuff.
Without getting into the weeds with psychological research, the 3-to-1 Ratio of positive-to -negative input defines the connection with positive communication and flourishing called the Losada Ratio.
Based on extensive research, Barbara Frederickson, a research scientist at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, found that companies with a better than 2.9:1 ratio of positive to negative statements in business meetings are flourishing. Below that ratio, they are not doing well economically. Though there is a limit (if the ratio is above 13:1, relationships become aimless and credibility is lost). She calls this the “Losada Ratio,” named for her colleague, Marcial Losada, who discovered the relationship between positive interactions and economic well-being (2011).
This 3:1 Positive:Negative Factor is a defiant strategy that UPs the amount of positive reinforcement you receive, improving your ability to flourish, and it is especially important for people who ruminate. Does your brain follow a negative thought “down a rabbit hole” until it often reaches some dire, doomsday scenario of horrible happenings? If so, you may be ruminating and spending way too much time and energy feeding your brain’s natural pattern to grasp and cling to negative thinking. I’m no mathematician, but you could be ratcheting up your brain’s negative-to-positive imbalance exponentially! You definitely need some cognitive training to (a) become more aware of your thinking on the edge of that rabbit hole and (b) divert your attention to possibility thinking.
Divert your attention with lots of affirmation about your signature strengths, your fantastic talents, your knowledge and expertise, your finely honed skills and abilities. If all you can control is where you focus your attention, control your thinking, your Losada Ratio, your well-being and your destiny by focusing on your strengths. Celebrate the Unique and Marvelous You many times a day each day, and before long, you’ll be in the habit of loving yourself more and lifting yourself up, and you won’t be waiting on anything or anyone else to take care that each day you’re improving your well-being and your ability to flourish.
Up Top, Baby! High Five! You’re Fierce, Compassionate, Beautiful and Brave!
All the Best Each Day,
Dr Mell
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Fredrickson (2011). qtd. in What’s your Losada ratio? http://inspireachieve.com.au/communication/whats-your-losada-ratio
